I don't know if it's because I work in a prison, but I've always been cautious around folks that are being extra extra nice to me. It doesn't matter one way or the other whether you get along with them, there's usually something behind their gestures. When I get a compliment at work my typical response is: "What do you want?" My next door neighbor, the guy who thought it would be okay to store his boat and trailer on my property (until my wife informed him otherwise), started waving to us every chance he could get--not the kind of wave that would draw you into a conversation along the fence line, instead, the kind of wave and forced smile that said "Good riddance to you." As proof of this, whenever we simultaneously walked out to our mailboxes and pulled down the latches, he'd act so engrossed in his junk mail that any acknowledgment would have been sacrilegious. Waving came mostly in the form of passing us on the street, his Toyota going one way, our Safari Mini-Van going the other way.
I've mentioned before how his live-in girlfriend sent us one of those obnoxious musical cards with a note of apology regarding his boat--the words written in her hand with his name scribbled off to the side and a transistor distorted “Sweet Home Alabama” assaulting our ears. You would've thought this meant returning to our old neighborly ways. I'll admit, the waving and friendly gesturing multiplied two-fold and even three-fold once a POD (portable on demand storage) box was delivered to his driveway. For about a month they hauled their miscellaneous items into that box. It wasn't long after that and they and their POD were gone.
Our neighbors across the street informed us that they had moved to Arizona. I truly wish them well and hope their new neighbors aren’t so territorial. Hey, it's been three months now and their house is still on the market. I know they wouldn't mind my using their hot tub because, after all, I did wave back from time to time.
22 comments:
Aren't you the funny one, Jim?! This cracked me up! Have fun in the hot tub!
I love the ending.
JR, you are too funny. Your pictures crack me up. A little porn in the morn.
:-)
Enjoy the hot tub!
Josie
Jim, Take every advantage of your EX-overly friendly neighbor. You might as well dig up his address and send him a photo of how you are doing here in MI. especially with the hot tub!! :) Good one. --Bro, Ron
I agree with everyone else! You are a mischievous one, JR!! Too funny!! Take advantage of the hot tub while you can! Hummm... I wonder if you could get a crew from the "work place" and haul the hot tub over to your side of the fence?
i don't think i've visited your blog before. i've seen you many times on josie's blog, so today here i am. i can assure you i'm not here to borrow any of your words, or previous blogposts. just wanted to say hi, and check out your blog. that's a good neighbor story; you're really funny. i live in an apt and i'm friendly enough for a brief chat, but not too friendly so no one will knock at my door to borrow a cup of sugar or want to use my telephone. enjoy the hot tub!
meant to say what a neat job working in the prisons.
oh man, does that look relaxing...
You shouldn't be so suspicious of people who are nice/friendly to you Mr. Thumbprints. We aren't all people with an agenda. :)
Looking at that photo, I had to think...."I bet his wife just shakes her head at his antics sometimes." I bet I am right, am I not? Your wife should do a post on your blog about you sometime, so we could get to read about her perspective of you.
I do visit your blog, but don't comment a lot, you get so many comments, I figure it has all been said. But I do stop by and read.
Ellie/Emily
Oh, JR! You are funny. I, like you, get suspicious when people are too too nice. Don't trust them as far as I can throw them. When the neighbors' waving increases, they invariably need to borrow the hubby or the pick up or both. Of I have to house sit. Some such thing. Hey, don't stay in too long and get wrinkled. Donnetta
Nice zinger, Jim. Luckily, it's a long way to Arizona.
LOL! Hell, we used to borrow the neighbor's power and water, what's a little hot tub every now and then?
I promise I won't tell him.
A hat trick of uncontrollable 'lol'ling days.
Please continue!
Hm.
I have only been in New York once, but I discovered some capacity in myself to develop "New York eyes", that is to say, assuming anybody who is nice to you will probably ask for a cigarette next,then your wallet, while his moll, behind you, will block escape should you want to run.
Seems, JR, that you have developed New York eyes.
Natural enough if you work where you work.
Maybe a a change for more of a smalltown atmosphere, where people are nice just because they are nice? Like a really swell smalltown jail?
There's got to be some place like Canada's "Club Fed" for high profile meium security criminals who have golf courses, swimming pools, gyms and really swell parties
and access to hookers.
Seems in the Seventies, everybody was moving up. Myself, through the Eighties,I kept moving down. I seemed to meet more of your Damon Runyon types than I cared to meet; I had no choice: turf war in the parking lot because some rub wanted your broken-down van.
Fistfight at the halfway house because some lout wanted your bed, because it was better.
About the only thing I learned was that you had to fall all the way down before you could make any progress.
Well, I'd say you're far from down--up, actually. But the psychological space around you and the need to have those New York eyes!
Ivan
Thanks for swinging by my blog. Loved the post. I am not really a "Neighborly" person. I.E. I do not want to really get to know my neighbors at all. (Very bizarre attitude for the state I live in)My idea of a great neighbor is one who doesn't flip me off as they are going into the house.
A hot tub? I'm jealous.
That was funny! I wonder if he will notice the sudden spike in his electrical bill?
Hope it is wired correctly. You don't see any lines going to your house do you? Just a thought. Bubbles, tiny bubbles. By your expression...looks like your making a few of your own. Fun post. MW
whahahahahaha....funny bunny:)
Hahahaha thats awesome!
Hah, good one! We've just had some very disruptive neighbours move out, and, when they did, everyone in the vicinity (we all loathed this family) took the chance to go into their back garden and chop down any trees that were too tall and were blocking the sunlight coming through to our little houses. Oh, the fun of it all.
Helen
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