While I’m on the discussion of transportation and/or lack thereof, I’d like to mention that our errors help define who we are. Yesterday, I mistakenly claimed that Detroit has a bus system, which it clearly does not. People mover yes, bus system no. My curt blog comment and indirect acknowledgment of the blunder demonstrates a poor understanding of mass transit systems and disregard for alternative methods for getting from place to place. Furthermore, it shows that I do not live in the city. I am, for all practical purposes, what you would call a “suburbanite.” Enough! I shall move forward.
Prior to Mr. Grimmett joining our teaching staff, my boss decided to hire a substitute teacher. She introduced me to Miss Ortland, a heavy-set, fair-complected, red-headed white woman. “Show her how your classroom operates; she’ll fill-in while you’re gone.” To be honest, I did not want a complete stranger running my program. I had visions of all my answer keys, resource books, and pencils and paper missing. But what choice did I have?
Miss Ortland didn’t stray too far from my desk, and you could see she had a genuine concern for her safety. It didn’t help that the inmates were flexing their pecs and complimenting her on her peculiar sense of fashion. Miss Ortland, you see, wore plain white blouses buttoned all the way up and knee-high plaid skirts. If she had been younger, I’d describe her outfit as something a Catholic schoolgirl wears. But it wasn’t so much her choice in clothes that made her appearance strange; it was what she wore underneath her skirt. Please do not rush to conclusions, it isn’t like I or my convict-students were stealing glances every chance we could get—at least not me anyway. What she had underneath was so damned obvious that nobody said anything about it.
Without my having to ask, she offered the following explanation: “I’ve been riding my bicycle to work.” We were in the middle of autumn, so I understood her wanting to keep her legs warm. I informed her of the employee lockers in the administration building. Still, I’m puzzled as to why she didn’t just wear slacks; it seemed like less of a hassle and a more practical way of concealing her long-johns.
17 comments:
Long-johns and a skirt? I can't think of an outfit that clashes any more than that...
Hey JR, give the woman a break. The fact that she wants to teach convicts is enough for me. The fact that she rode her bike to work speaks of her courage. To hell with fashion. MW
Hey JR why didnt' you start picking her up on the way to work after you picked up mr. G?
The "Detroit has a bus system?" was a tongue in cheek comment, Detroit has buses but with the last round of layoffs quite a few of the bus mechanics were transferred to DPW to work on garbage trucks. So now they bought a fairly new fleet of buses and it's the garbage trucks that aren't getting fixed right. The truth of the DOT is that the system only runs major routes now sometimes forcing people to walk a few miles after the bus drops them off. I am a city dweller but don't ask me what the fares are.
I wonder if Miss Ortland road her bike because she was trying to work of pounds or was a green trying to save the earth in her small way. And if you were at the Ryan facility I hope she pedaled very fast.
But the entire outfit even sans the long johns truly projects the image of fear & vulnerability; which having been in more than one prison visiting room seems to be the wrong clothes to wear especially if she wore black lace up shoes with it.
Do you work with anyone normal?
Last summer I re-assembled my old Schwinn Continental (purchased at Bob's Schwinn shop somewhere over by Stony Creek in 1972. Back then the were hard to find in stock.) Even though I have a newer 18-speed, I must admit that riding my old Schwinn made me feel ten years younger than my newer bike and it glides forever...
Maybe I should give her my "Get Busy" T-shirt. I think they'd look great with the long johns!
Long john and a plaid skirt, now there's a fashion statement. What color were they? You must admit, she had guts.
Josie
Ummm. I wear long underwear and boots and skirts frequently in the winter. Docs look great with longjohns and kilts.
It's pronounced like leopards.
And lights.
Ivan
Thankgod it never gets so cold here
Wow JR You had me there.. I was thinking something TOTALLY different.
Firstly I can't believe that they would allow a woman to teach in a prison. mmm a bit dangerous Id say, so I understand why maybe she was scared.. but yes, getting rid of the long john would have helped a bit I think..Shame poor woman.
I love the description -- Catholic schoolgirl meets practical fashion. I'm not much for the practical, but hey, I can understand it. She'd be a great character in a story with a get up like that!
michelle's spell,
Exactly so. A character in a short story. Now if we can get JR to extend...
Ivan
I wear long johns when I ride in the cold. But usually I leave the skirt at home on those days.
Charles is that because it blows up and covers your face plate?
Jim, Funny story with the long johns on under the ladies skirt. Hey, at least she was wearing something underneath instead of providing a quick peek. Looks like patterns of ink is from our town. Do we know this guy??? --Bro, Ron
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