THIS IS NOT ABOUT DICK DEBECK

Some of my stories are about real people. It’s funny how when you try to be very accurate, it’s boring and there’s nothing there. But when you distort the reality, it comes back stronger than before and is often closer to the truth.
—Tatyana Tolstaya

Thirteen odd years ago, on my wedding day, I wore Chuck Taylor’s and Dick DeBeck’s hat. Chuck Taylor’s are cheap canvassed high-tops. Dick DeBeck’s hat is … well … Dick DeBeck’s hat. Dick DeBeck is on the Advisory Board of the Ludington Visiting Writers. Click on (LVW) , scroll all the way down, and you can see Dick DeBeck.

But this is not about Chuck Taylor’s, Dick DeBeck, or my wedding per se. My wedding guests were not preapproved and LEIN cleared (Law Enforcement Information Network). I was allowed more than six people at my wedding. My wedding band exceeded $50.00 in value. I did not have to wear state issued shoes. And thank God, my wife was not forced to hold a cheap plastic wedding bouquet.

On the other hand, Prisoner Echols and his fiancee had to abide by all these rules and more. He asked me, wait, no, he told me, “I won’t be in class tomorrow. I’m getting married.” I learned that his soon-to-be-wife was a topless dancer at BT’s (The Booby Trap) and that they were so in love that she was willing to wait, for however long it takes, for him to be released from prison.

The day after their ceremony, Prisoner Echols proudly displayed some cheap Polaroid’s for everyone to see. I said, “I think she did a lap dance for me once.” He simply collected his photos and sat down in the back of the classroom. I guess he did not like my comment. Perhaps it was the sudden realization that other men had easier access to his wife than he. Just to hammer home my point, I asked, “So where did you go on your honeymoon?”