THE SHARK TANK

Imagine working in a shark tank, trying to hold your own, trying to do your job. I’m not tough, it’s really not me. The other teachers exclude themselves from the decision making process. I schedule all the GED Exams, coordinate it with MW. Murders and rapists—and I don’t know them all—try to intimidate me. "What shoe size do you wear?" one will ask, leading me to think he’d off me and have my shoes if I don’t schedule him for testing. I tell him they’re a size 9, "but when I get through with you," I say, "they’ll feel like a size 12." I’ve never lost a pair.

If you slip up, lose your cool, then it’s like a feeding frenzy, the inmates will exploit your weaknesses. Also, never show your soft side. Be tough. Keep control of your area. "You are totally useless, you sit there and yap like a little school girl about total bullshit, nothing’s relevant," I tell an inmate not doing his classroom work, "so shut the hell up, that’s a direct order." And he does. He doesn’t say boo. Sticks his nose in a book and reads for 15 minutes. So I feel bad. Really really bad. I think maybe I’m too harsh. So I go over to him and apologize. "Hey man," I say, "I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings."

Reality check. "Hurt my feelings?" he replies. "F…k, you can’t hurt my feelings. Hurting my feelings is when the judge told me I got to do 12 to 20 years in this shithole."

I still feel bad. Not for him, but for myself. I have at least 15 more years before retirement. Fifteen more years of dealing with people like him. But the shark tank is much bigger than I’d thought. I teach year round, had to renew my teaching certificate by today, June 30, 2006. Submitted the necessary paperwork to the Michigan Department of Education. Still waiting for them to mail my certificate along with a bill for $125. Have to pay the state to work for the state. Received the following memo from personnel. Most teachers don’t receive their certificate until the end of August when the public schools start their new school year. But I’m not a normal teacher, I work for the Department of Corrections. I’ll keep you posted as to my job status.