LIQUID HAM

I don’t know if this picture symbolizes a rite of passage—I didn’t get the photo album from my mother until after my parents moved—but once I peeled away the laminate covering and pulled the picture out, I read the following on the back: Jim’s first beer. I was the ripe old age of eight.

I can’t recall how many more beers I’ve had over my life time (I can assure you that Towne Club was my favorite as a child; see previous post) nor can I tell you how many more beers I’ll have in the future. You’d think I’d wisen up by now.

Six years ago I was tested for allergies. The doctor told me I was allergic to hops and tomato. In layman’s terms he meant: "beer and pizza." My initial reaction—denial—this can’t be. Moderation then, he said, and for chrissake, don’t have it on rainy days due to higher mold counts.

I still partake in these two luxury items; however, I’ve had to be extremely careful. Sometimes I develop severe migraines from my over indulgences; then I wonder if beer is an acquired taste? I know meat is an acquired taste. Show me a kid who loves chewing meat the first time it’s placed in front of him and I’ll show you a kid that spits it up—even if it’s a McDonald’s hamburger. Coincidentally, I’m drinking Hamm’s in the photo. How ironic.