Tuesday, September 29, 2009

CRUEL & UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT













He sits in a wheelchair, my classroom tutor, and he talks real sharp to everyone because, as he’s stated many times before, “I’m going to die in prison, so I’ll speak my mind.”

He missed two weeks of work due to segregation, due to running his mouth in the chow hall when another inmate cut in front of him. He says the guy sucker-punched him, that he fell out of his wheelchair, had a seizure, blacked-out.

“You’re gonna pay me,” he says.

“How do I know you weren’t found guilty of fighting?” Segregation, after all, is a revolving door—seven days in, then back to general population. My classroom tutor did fourteen days; I’m a little suspicious.

He says, “That’s absurd,” and quotes policy, “through no fault of my own I was unable to report for duty.” Then I hear about how he’s going to slap a grievance on my ass, how Carl Marlinga (ex-Macomb County Prosecutor turned convict lawyer) is already defending him in a legal case against the Michigan Department of Corrections … blah, blah, blah … the mouth in perpetual motion.

I actually enjoyed not having him in my room. I’m not sure whether he showers regularly or has a colostomy bag or both, but he stinks up my classroom and the smell lingers. I know this might sound terrible, but I think I'll write an evaluation regarding his personal hygiene and have him thrown out of my class. Between the mouth and odor, I’m tired of him.

11 comments:

jason evans said...

Sounds like a model worker. The only thing missing is crazy.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't want to work next to a stink bomb. Go for you, send his ars back to the pen!! --Bro, Ron

Erik Donald France said...

Indeed, who wouldn't be tired of him?

And man, the Lions actually won a game . . .

Get this: "Texas financier R. Allen Stanford, awaiting trial on charges he ran a $7 billion Ponzi scheme, will be moved from the lockup where he got into a jail fight that resulted in him being hospitalized for a concussion. . . Schaffer said his client, who he visited Monday, is still in physical pain from the concussion, two black eyes, broken nose and cut on his forehead that he suffered during the fight. Stanford was returned to the lockup Sunday afternoon. . ."

the walking man said...

You have the right to order your classroom as you see fit and I doubt they would give you disability for enduring the stink much less the bullshit.

Whitenoise said...

I couldn't do your job, I'm not pragmatic enough.

Anonymous said...

I had you pegged as the conisoure of stink. Keep up the good work. There are so many piles to choose from. You should be very busy in the coming year. LOL MW

Four Dinners said...

but has he ever bought you a beer?

....if not push him off downhill with faulty brakes

jodi said...

JR-Okay, that dude is just nasty. He's got to be distracting to both you and the other students. Buh-bye!

Bebo said...

You know, it'll be so much easier to do your job without the gas mask...

Lana Gramlich said...

Sounds like he's not worth the hassle. I like the photo in this post, btw.

Julie said...

I agree. It's bad enough to deal with stank, but troublemaking stank is too much.