I just haven’t been “feeling it” lately, and I’m not sure whether the approaching holidays are affecting my otherwise bland routine or what. Not even the lunatics—too numerous to count—are able to shock me out of my doldrums; I’m afraid they’ve become the norm.
A rather large student, on the heavier side of two-hundred fifty pounds, approaches me in the corridor. Most days I can’t shut him up, but today he remains awkwardly silent. He invades my space, leaving little room to maneuver around the girth of his stomach.
“What’s your problem?” I ask. I’m not interested in whatever bullshit he’s going to pull.
He remains tight-lipped. A few inmates laugh.
“What? You’re not speaking today?” I ask.
He opens his mouth wide, exposing his dry chalky tongue (daily medication will do that); a grasshopper hops out, landing on the tiled floor.
“You need some Hershey’s chocolate syrup,” I suggest.
He bends down, picks up the grasshopper, and places it back in his mouth. I’m perfectly content with this arrangement; anything to keep him quiet.
11 comments:
The lunatic fringe has definitely taken center stage. Don't sweat the doldrums Jim they too shall pass.
I admire greatly what you do. I was incarcerated in Jesup in Md in '96. Due to funding lots of programs that were available than are no longer offered to prisoners now. Shake the blues away and remember even if you only impact one prisoner you have made a difference. The work you do is so very important. Don't get lost in the insanity.
I've heard of Cat got your tongue, but never grasshopper got your tongue. Maybe it's a pet.
Strange how "sane" becomes relative after a while. <:\
Maybe he's thinking of taking up Kung-Fu?...ahhhhh glasshopper....
Frog Prince here.
...Well, the operation wasn't quite a complete success!
Four Dinners:
Rumors be damned. Master Po and Grasshopper were just friends.
JR-we all feel these ruts now and then. They seem to work themselves out. Here's some simple advice for ya. Since your work can be so crazy/depressing/disheartening, etc., make sure you do what YOU like to do as often as possible. Feel better, JR.
Made me laugh. And just in time too--right after I read this the first time, we had to remove one of our costomers for having left a urine puddle under his barstool.
I followed up ths incident with a friendly reminder to all our other customers that indeed our bathrooms are functioning.
And tonight it's $6 shots of Patron. If youre gonna be a bear be a grizzly.
It's a really great ending. Perfect.
Life is stranger than fiction, as the old cliche goes. But this would be (and already is) an awesome flash story. If you haven't sent it out, I hope you do. I'll never forget the image of this guy. Good writing, JR.
I hope you shake the doldrums soon. On the other hand, doldrums where you work might be a good thing.
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