"NEXXXXT!"

Although my popularity is waning due to a recent uptick in “guilty” verdicts on the MDOC docket (Michigan Department of Corrections) and due to a list of potential witnesses regarding allegations of how I targeted a few select inmates, it stands to reason that I am not a corrupt, power hungry, authoritative figure. When you’re a “no show” for a testing date and I write you an “Out of Place” ticket, when you fail to attend your Kangaroo Court investigative hearing because your yard activities are more important, then what makes you think sniping at me from the back of the classroom will change anything? Besides, your list of witnesses collaborating your claim that I said, “Class will be cancelled tomorrow”—as unreliable as they are (murders, rapists, drug dealers, you name it)—these witnesses of yours, they showed up on the day in question.

Furthermore, no one’s paying me to be “popular.” I have a job to do—I teach—and if you don’t like it, if you can’t respect that, if you can’t have the common decency to keep your mouth shut and your ears open, then perhaps I should use sign language. (Stage Directions: Narrator points to the door and says, “Get the &#*@! out of my classroom!”)

So there you have it—my typical workday in the joint. And I still think it’s much better than the public schools. At least in here I have the best classroom management a teacher could ask for. Kick one out. Bring one in.