USED-CAR SALESMAN

Sometimes I feel like a used-car salesman--usually when I've convinced some bag-of-meat doing natural life that it's important he get his GED (hillbilly talk for Get 'Er Done). I'll say stuff like, "Hey, I can't quote Chuck Taylor on this one, but in the words of that great NIKE God--Just do it!" And if they're still not convinced I go into my tire-kicking mode with a rah-rah chant saying, "What's the last four letters in the word American? I-C-A-N! I-C-A-N! I CAN! I CAN!" Of course none of this works, but for entertainment purposes more than anything my captive audience is amused.

In today's picture I'm weighing a cat. Of course it's not a winner--however, if I had enough sinkers to shove down its throat I might place. I still haven't heard anything about the missing fishermen. Haven't read a newspaper in days (something to do with the Selepak idiot!). Should a person give up hope? When is all motivation lost?

In other news, on Saturday I'll be dealing with approximately eighty elementary schools as the event coordinator for "Don't Bug Me." The young Science Olympiads will identify various insects at twenty different stations (one minute per station). These third through sixth graders are self-motivated and want to learn. What a concept! And on their own too! Wish me luck. It's the largest elementary Science Olympiad in the United States.