Wednesday, May 20, 2009

BACKYARD KITCHEN














Am I to stop what I’m doing when the neighbors power wash their Little Tikes Kitchen Set with all its accessories? Should I tell them ex post facto that it’s okay to line their plastic “Made-in-China” toys along my wooden fence to dry? I guess it doesn’t really matter; I’ve been looking at their Toys-R-Us collection all winter long, so why not “temporarily” encroach on my property? I should be comfortable with it by now: The previous neighbors parked a boat and trailer on my lawn without asking for permission. After they moved I hopped the fence and did a little celebratory “hot tubbing.” Unfortunately, the new neighbors did not repair it; instead, they hauled it away.

So I’m jabbing my Ryobi weed whacker (“Made-in-Canada”) along the fence-line and I guess I’m throwing a little grass and dirt here and there—it’s bound to happen no matter how careful I am—and the neighbor lady’s screaming for her husband to move their precious junk off my lawn. He, in turn, scrambles to please her. Am I sorry? Yeah, sure … for him.

With Memorial weekend fast approaching and warm weather forecasted, I’ll do some swimming in my pool, cook a few burgers and perhaps converse with this young couple across the chain link fence. It’s the neighborly thing to do. Anything is better than dealing with mentally disturbed prisoners; I just hope my neighbors can deal with me.

9 comments:

David Cranmer said...

Any film of the celebratory "hot tubbing?"

I have a neighbor who I have been quarreling with (on and off) for twenty-five years over a right of way we share. Finally this past winter I said "who gives a F%#" and let it go... maybe.

...... Bobbi said...

Hehe - so glad I'm not the only one with self-centered neighbors!!

Celticspirit said...

Ok so I have to admit my kids had that little tykes stuff when they were little but we did not put it in the neighbors yard. I lived in an apartment at that time in one of two large apartment houses owned by the ex's grandma and all the neighbors were relatives.....so that was a good thing but now always.

Charles Gramlich said...

That's a major reason I wanted to live in the country. But even here we have issues at times.

Beth said...

You'll charm them - you're probably charming them now...
Love your "Made-in-Canada" weed whacker!

jodi said...

Good Lord, if anyone ever needed a privacy fence--it's you, J.R. However, I love the Ryobi and LaBatt Blue, keepin' all things Canada. Go Wings!

the walking man said...

Trade ya neighbors Jim...anytime.

Whitenoise said...

Happy holiday weekend, Jim!

Lana Gramlich said...

I hear you. Unfortunately last year we had neighbors move in who let their kids drive the riding lawnmower around in front of our house ALL THE F*CKING TIME. I want to set the thing on fire, I swear. The thing that kills me is that there are no houses in the other direction...F*CK OFF, you little b@$t@rd$!