Thursday, June 18, 2009

PRISON GRADUATION 2009

















I'm not quite sure how I got roped into it, probably because I'm an "Old Head,” and even though I received a 4.0 grade in my college public speaking course, I certainly didn't volunteer for the task. I couldn't duck-n-dodge the Master of Ceremonies duty for this year's prison graduation. We had approximately 140 people in attendance, including Jeff Gerritt, a Detroit Free Press columnist. He was our keynote speaker offering words of wisdom to approximately 100 inmates.

With my back against the wall, with no room to maneuver, I agreed to MC; I did it under the following conditions: Get me an interview and photo op with Jeff Gerritt. Make it front page material. Also, allow me the freedom to give my opinions without censorship by the Michigan Department of Corrections.

Were my demands met? Nope. I guess I wanted too much. Still, the graduation went as smooth and silky as the skin on a baby catfish.

The highlight of the event: One of the GED Graduates, bloated and crazy from all his psychotropic meds, did as I had suggested in our rehearsal. "Mr. T," he reminded me, "remember to remove your rubber bands before stepping up to the podium.”

Thank you, Inmate Brown!

10 comments:

Beth said...

Bet you made a great MC!
(oh, lordy – braces/"wire" going on Monday - forgot all about rubber bands...)

jodi said...

JR, Stamp you foot when your demands are not made. Hey, it works for me! Throw back that nasty catfish!

ivan@creativewriting.ca said...

Egad.

Charles Gramlich, who often visits here, would probably love that picture of you for a paranormal series.
Oh Dracula grin.

the walking man said...

Hey Jim...You had a captive audience...I hope you read them a bunch of your short stories and flash fiction!

Inside our hands, outside our hearts said...

Do you catch and release or do you eat that beautiful fish? I might have a hard time letting that go.

T

Charles Gramlich said...

Next you'll be MCing the MTV music awards.

Anonymous said...

nice rubber bands

Erik Donald France said...

Hey man, I'm wanting to see a video!

Date of post: Waterloo ;->

JR's Thumbprints said...

Hands & Heart, I'll eat the young ones Cajun style.

Julie said...

Hee hee. I love it. It sorta sounds like my high school graduation.