WOMEN DRIVERS

Now that I’ve gotten your attention with the title of my post, raised your dander so to speak, it’s only appropriate that I mention two crashes by two women at the Indy 500. But before I go into it, let me tell you about my experiences at Indy. As a young boy in the mid 70’s, I witnessed all kinds of inappropriate behavior leading up to race day. My family would make a long weekend out of it, camping in a field that funneled into the inner track where the real race began, where everyone jockeyed for position to get the best view. The third turn was preferable, statistically speaking, because that’s where most of the racing cars kissed the wall.

While we camped out, I witnessed enough drunken debauchery to last a life time. Men pooled their money together for women to pop their tops, and hey, since there was money to be made, there were mammary glands to be seen. Call it the mardi gras of racing. Another pre-race activity that wasn’t such a good idea were grown-ups playing a serious game of football, only one problem—there wasn’t enough ground—which meant passing, running, and tackling took place on the hood of cars. Of course injuries occurred, but I seriously doubt anyone felt any pain until days afterward; at least not like the drunkard who walked through someone’s campfire and was busy picking embers from the bottom of his feet. I observed him on race day drinking whiskey from a bottle, hobbling to the bathroom, sun burnt and dehydrated, his guttural moan less audible.

When the gates opened to the race track infield, the real competition began. Engines started. Fists waved. People swore. Horns blared. My uncle, who traveled by himself and camped out longer than most, warned a man in a corvette not to take cuts or he’d hit him. The man didn’t believe him and a fender bender ensued. Once inside, platforms were built on top of vehicles—our own private grandstands. Here’s a picture of yours truly in his early teens, shirtless, waiting for the race, and since my binoculars couldn’t possibly keep up with the blur of cars, I focused in on the spectator shenanigans instead.


















As for those women racers this year: Sarah Fisher finished 30th due to Tony Kanaan hitting the third turn wall and spinning out in front of her, and Danica Patrick finished 22nd because of a pit area collision with Ryan Briscoe. Danica wanted to teach him proper racing etiquette; fortunately, for his sake, security wouldn’t let her near him

This year, Milka Duno had the top women’s spot, finishing 19th overall. Not a very good Indy 500 for the women. Perhaps they should form their own racing team. Maybe then, the world of racing would change for the better. What do you think?